Almost at midway point

I am amazed at how fast time has gone. We're approaching week 20 and God continues to be very good to us. The baby continues to grow, Mimi is getting just a little bigger each week. Her last weigh in was at 118.5, from her starting weight of 112.5. 6 pounds is pretty good since they say the average gain is around 20 lbs. My guess is that the weight will start coming on during the second half when the baby begins to really grow quickly and exponentially.

We recently had dinner with Evelyn, Justin, and other co-workers of Mimi. Evelyn is about 2 months ahead of Mimi in her pregnancy. It is pretty funny because they are doing all the research on child care, stollers, cribs, etc. All these things that we will need to be doing very soon too. Luckily, we keep in close contact and can benefit from their research.

Mimi and I have been a little bit lazy on researching these things. I think we both are pretty busy with work that we really fail to address the needs of the baby at this particular time. I would not say that it means we don't care, I think it is not having the full mindset that we are going to have this baby and it is coming is about 5 months. One of the first things we need to do is get our names on the waiting list for these day care centers. The waiting time is terribly long, and so everyone always says we need to get our names on the list. In all honesty, I would rather keep my baby at home, hire a nanny and see if my parents can be around to monitor what goes on in the home. If my parents were not around, my paranoid thought pattern would be to hire a nanny, and then rig the house with cameras in each room that I could then view from a personal website and monitor every so often. The latter is going a little bit too far, but that would be interesting.

I'm also realizing that we might want to take a class on birthing. I'll be the first to acknowledge that I don't know much about it. I have seen a woman giving birth once in my life and it certainly was interesting. I just want to make sure that I'm prepared for our own child. I guess this is where reading the material that Mimi has for me would be helpful. So this is kind of funny. Mimi said that she knew I had not yet read the section of the book for dads. I asked her how she knew and she said that when she was younger, she would put a string in the book as a marker, and if the string was no longer there then she knew the book was read. In that little body of hers is a mind that is full of traps and schemes to know information. There are other things that I would share about how she finds information, but I cannot post them here. However, if you are reading this, you know what I'm talking about when I say that you are good at finding out information.

I continue to struggle with getting my work stabilized. In fact, the further I go with these projects, the deeper I find myself. For instance, the private practice situation has a few promising leads, but it might take a large effort for me to follow these leads. It is through Seaton Hospital. I also met with the president of the San Mateo County Psychological Association and she encouraged me to pursue assessments for adult ADHD. This is actually a relatively untapped market and could be a strong niche for me. Then there is the desire to pursue psychological consultation services to board and care facilities with Ton, which is an interesting endeavor unto itself. I agree that this could be very lucritive, but a large amount of work that I just don't think I'll have the time for. I found out recently, that a 44 bed board and care facility charges 5500.00 per person. I calculated it out to be about 2.9 million per year, not including all costs involved to run the place. That seems like an awefully large sum of money. This is something to consider in the long run, but something to do with a few people who actually have capital. I can then lend my expertise in this area. I guess the thing of it is, when the baby comes, I must shift my attention from the work to the home. I have to and I must put the family as priority. God knows that I enjoy my work, but the family must come first. The home is my sanctuary, where I can find peace, safety, and security. For those who don't have that, I can see how life might be very difficult. This is why I can never let this leave my mind, that home is where I need to put my family first with God as our leader, and make this the priority of my life.

He who has ears, let him hear.

We've reached the 17-18th week mark. Thus far, all of the ultrasounds and the doppler visits have been great. There is a healthy heart beat and our baby is moving around. In fact, there was one visit to the perinatal doctor where they did a 3D ultrasound. That was just the coolest thing, looking at our baby from the top down. Just awesome at what technology can do. Here is a video of our baby.

The reason I titled this "He who has ears, let him hear" is because at this stage, our baby now can hear things. The baby can hear the sounds of Mimi's body, can hear loud enough noises that penetrate through the womb. The baby is starting to develop the senses needed to survive in this world we currently live in. I have to say, God is amazing at how he can take two things as microscopic as a sperm and an egg and create a human being. The number of possibilities for things to go wrong are just huge, and yet many of these pregnancies turn out just fine.



So as it turns out, we are definitely not alone in the process of having children. Just to name some of those who are currently going through the same process we are, but at various other stages. Some are ahead of us and some behind, but all of us are essentially going to have a baby. My sister Christina, Evelyn, Jenn, Eunice, Mimi's other friend from her home church, Zeena, and I know there are many more but I just can't remember them right now. I think in total, there are about 9-10 other women pregnant right now. That is just amazing. My prayer is that for each and every one of them, that God will bless them with a healthy baby and that we can all share in the celebration of these new births over the next year.



I was wondering to myself why I was working so hard at work. I actually realized that it had to do with the baby coming. I want to make sure that everything at work is as steady as can be so that when the baby comes, I am not feeling the pressure to stay at work late and missing the growing up phase of the baby. I don't want to be the Dad who comes home late and the baby is asleep and I can't hold the baby. I don't want to be the absent father who is unable to make that connection. I've wanted children for a while now, and I want to be an involved father who shares my life with them. I want us to most of all, be a family unit and I feel that it comes from my example of putting the family first. I guess that is why I'm busting my butt at work right now, so that I can build the foundation and the steadiness that is needed for my staff to essentially handle things should I not be around for short periods of time. It certainly is very difficult right now with new interns, but I'm glad that I have the post doc and the new staff member to help carry the load. I just need to continue to remind myself that the job is a job, but family is forever.

I have to say, as new parents and this being our first child, there is a level of anxiety that exists beneath the surface. We know that in the second trimester, we're past the danger point, but at the same time, we're concerned that any little thing could or might go wrong. Being believers of God, we trust Him and have faith that the gift given to us will be cared for. We pray consistently for this baby, for health and we thank God for this gift that we have been blessed with. In the same regard, I think our human side over takes us and we want something, something more tangible to grasp on to. When this happens to turn to our technology. We're fortunate enough to have access to a doppler or ultrasound machine when we want to see the baby or hear the heart beat. This was something that Mimi and I strugged with this morning, and I can sense will always be a struggle until the baby is actually born. I know that we both have a lot to learn, and we'll have many chances to talk to parents who have been down this road as well.

So till the next time, I'll stop here. By the next post, we should know the sex of the baby and then we'll start considering names.